Pastor Kevin Sanders – Page 78 – But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. -2 Corinthians 4:7

I believe 1st Corinthians 7 is one of the most misunderstood parts of the New Testament. I find it ironic that authors have approached this text and come to radically different conclusions on how to apply it to the Christian life.

The “marriage mandate” folks (those who believe we are obligated to marry) essentially dismiss Paul’s encouragement to stay single as only relevant to the specific crisis in Corinth.

The “gift of singleness” camp seems to think God has assigned the state of singleness or marriage in the same way He has assigned spiritual gifts.

I can even remember reading a tract/pamphlet (based on this chapter) arguing we should stay single unless we sense a specific call from God to marry. I was in college at the time, and I didn’t find it very encouraging.

I believe some of these approaches to the text just don’t cut it. I suggest we keep a few things in mind:

1. Scripture interprets Scripture. We have to interpret 1st Corinthians 7 in light of the Bible as a whole. This means, for example, that we should remember the Bible’s overall message about marriage/family in mind when reading this chapter. In other words, 1st Corinthians 7 isn’t the only part of the Bible that speaks of singleness and marriage.

2. Context is crucial. We should not take Scriptures out of context for or own agenda. We must first look at what comes before and after certain passages, who the writer and audience are, etc. About 99% of cults would disappear if people would just read the context of the verses their false prophets use to propagate heresies. Understanding the historical/geographical setting of a particular Scripture is also extremely helpful.

3. Look for timeless principles. Some of our current practices just don’t have an exact parallel in the Bible. Our modern-day practice of dating comes to mind—they didn’t date (or court) like we do now back in ancient times. But we can take the Bible’s principles (sexual purity, honest, etc.) and apply them to this modern practice.

Having said all this, I’ll share a few of my humble thoughts on this passage.

The Corinthian Context:

Sexual immorality was rampant in ancient Corinth. Pagan religions had temples specifically built to house prostitutes. It was perfectly acceptable for Roman men (even married men) to go visit said prostitutes. Apparently some of the early Christians were struggling to live pure lives in this X-rated environment (see 1 Corinthians 6). Sound familiar?

Greek philosophy offered little guidance. Some philosophers taught that life should be spent pursuing pleasure (Hedonism). Others believed pleasure should be avoided altogether, and some pagan religions encouraged all converts (married or single) to be celibate. I imagine the men weren’t too excited when their wives came home and told them they had just joined the “no sex” cult.

The Roman concept of marriage was equally confusing. Roman society had different types of marriages, from common-law arrangements to more legitimate covenants. Disposable marriages were commonplace: ancient records reveal some Roman citizens married/divorced over twenty times.

You can see why the Corinthian Christians were so confused. It seems Paul was responding to the questions from these ancient believers. We don’t know exactly what they asked because we don’t have their letters. But maybe the questions looked something like this:

“Should a husband and wife abstain from sexual intimacy?”
“I was divorced before I became a Christian. Should I get married again?”
“I am a believer now, but my spouse isn’t. Should I leave him/her?”
“I am a widow/widower. Is it OK to get married again?”

Now I’ll share a few of the principles I see in this chapter. These are not exhaustive, but maybe you will find them helpful.

1. God designed sex to be expressed only within marriage. Paul encouraged married couples to freely enjoy sexual intimacy. He even warned them against depriving each other, lest they become more susceptible to temptations of non-marital sex (vs. 1-5).

2. God intended marriage to be a life-long covenant. Believers with non-Christian spouses were commanded to honor their marriage covenant if the non-believer was willing to stay married. Those who had separated were urged to be reconciled with their spouses (vs. 10-16).

At this point I won’t get into whether or not there are biblical grounds for divorce. I’d rather stick with God’s intent for marriage–believers should go into marriage with the intention of being in a covenant for life.

3. Christians should only marry other Christians. Paul tells widows they are free to get married again, but only to a believer (vs. 39).

4. Married life and single life each have their own respective privileges and challenges. Singles have to deal with loneliness and sexual frustration (vs. 9). Those who are married must put the needs of their spouses ahead of ministry (vs. 32-35). The “crisis” mentioned in vs. 26 was one reason Paul encouraged the Corinthians to remain single. We should keep this context in mind, but it doesn’t change the general principle: the responsibilities of marriage should be taken seriously, and singleness does have some advantages when it comes to ministry.

5. THE C WORD

There’s one word I find lacking in many discussions of singleness and marriage: CHOICE.

This passage is all about biblical choices. Read through it carefully and see how Paul leaves the choice up to the reader:

*The decision of whether or not to marry:

“But if a man thinks that he’s treating his fiancée improperly and will inevitably give in to his passion, let him marry her as he wishes. It is not a sin. But if he has decided firmly not to marry and there is no urgency and he can control his passion, he does well not to marry (vs. 36-37).”

*The decision of who to marry:

“She is free to marry anyone she wishes . . .” (vs. 39).

Paul simply laid out the biblical options and encouraged the Corinthians to make their own decisions. He didn’t tell them to sit back, pray, and ask God to write their love stories for them. He didn’t tell them to expect God to choose their spouses for them (see God’s Will and “The One”).

Here’s what I find ironic: a chapter written to help clarify our choices has often been presented in a way that has just the opposite effect. Singles hear misguided sermons and feel guilty for wanting to be married. Others worry they’ve been given the “gift of singleness” (which doesn’t usually feel like a gift). We should instead read this passage and see the freedom God has given us to make choices–as long as we stay within biblical boundaries.

I don’t claim to be the authoritative voice on this controversial chapter of the Bible. But I hope this post has shed light on it for you or helped you look at it in a balanced way.

Jesus, Joseph, and Forgiveness

“I forgive you.”

These three words may be the most difficult thing you’ll ever say to another human being. But forgiving and letting go are essential steps if one is to truly follow Jesus and experience the abundant life He offers.

Jesus preached a radical message of forgiveness, instructing His listeners to turn the other cheek and pray for those who persecuted them (Matthew 5:38-48). Peter thought he was being generous with an offer to forgive seven times. But Jesus told him to forgive “seventy times seven” (Matthew 18:22), and made the point even more clear with the Parable of the Unforgiving Debtor. The message of the parable is clear: my debt to God dwarfs any transgression my fellow man has committed against me. Jesus didn’t just preach forgiveness—he demonstrated it on the cross when he asked his father to forgive those who were torturing him (Luke 23:34).

We know we should forgive. It honors God and it heals our souls. But our nature is to seek revenge, so forgiveness can only come through the supernatural grace and power of God.

Let me say a couple of things before I go any further.

1. Forgiveness and trust are not the same things: God does not require us to trust everyone, even those we have forgiven. Forgiveness should be freely offered, but trust must be earned.

2. Seeking legal justice is consistent with the Bible’s teachings (Romans 13:1-5). Laws have to be enforced in order to protect the innocent.

What I’ve said may help to clarify the issue, but it still doesn’t make it “easy.” How can we really forgive and let go?

I find one of the most profound, helpful lessons on this topic in the Old Testament: the story of Joseph.

Joseph was the favored son Jacob. He was treated preferentially and given a beautiful robe. The family tension came to a breaking point when Joseph spoke of his dreams—visions of his entire family bowing before him. His siblings, consumed with jealousy, plotted to kill him. Judah talked his brothers out of murder and convinced them to sell Joseph into slavery. The favorite son was stripped of his coat, his rights, and sent off to Egypt as a piece of property.

Joseph wound up in the house of Potiphar, and Egyptian officer. He found favor there, and was soon put in charge of the entire household. But there was a problem—Potiphar’s wife. She continually made sexual advances towards the young, handsome slave boy. Ironically, she accused him of rape after he refused to go along with her plan. An enraged Potiphar threw Joseph in prison.

Joseph continued to use his gifts in prison. He accurately interpreted the dreams of two fellow inmates. One of them was the Pharaoh’s cupbearer, a position of considerable political power. The cupbearer was released from prison and restored, just as Joseph had promised. But he quickly forgot Joseph after returning to office.

Two years later, the Pharaoh himself was disturbed by a dream. He consulted with all his spiritual advisers, but none of them could help. His cupbearer finally remembered the young Hebrew who gave him hope. Pharaoh immediately ordered Joseph to be brought to him.

Joseph accurately interpreted the Pharaoh’s dream: there would be seven years of prosperity, followed by seven years of famine. He encouraged the Pharaoh to store as much food as possible in preparation for the coming shortage. Pharaoh was so impressed with Joseph’s counsel that he put him in charge of the entire nation. His power would be second only to Pharaoh himself. Joseph had been a favored son, a slave, a prisoner, and now one of the most powerful men in the world—all by age thirty.

The story doesn’t end there. The famine did come, but Joseph had prepared his adoptive nation. Joseph’s family, however, was not so fortunate. They were starving, and reluctantly came to Egypt in hopes of buying grain. Joseph’s brothers approached him, but they no longer recognized him. They bowed before him with their face to the ground, unwittingly fulfilling the dream they so despised.

Joseph didn’t immediately reveal his identity. He used some clever (and amusing) tactics to ensure his brothers would return with Benjamin, his full brother (the others were half-siblings). Finally, after some terrifying moments for his siblings, Joseph revealed his true identity. The Pharaoh also heard of this and invited the entire family to come live under the protection of Egypt. Joseph was eventually reunited with his entire family, including his father.

The last chapter of Genesis records the death of Jacob. Joseph’s brothers were afraid he would finally take revenge once their father was gone. Once again they fell before him, this time begging for forgiveness. Joseph responded with this statement:

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it all for good. He brought me to this position so I could save the lives of many people.” –Genesis 50:20

Think about all the people Joseph chose to forgive:

*His own brothers, who sold him into slavery.
*Potiphar’s wife, who falsely accused him of rape.
*Potiphar, who threw him into prison.
*The cupbearer, who forgot as soon as he was released from prison.

Joseph could have unleashed his rage on everyone who had harmed him. Remember—his power was second only to Pharaoh. Why didn’t he? Why did he choose to forgive?

I think Genesis 50:20 gives us part of the answer. Joseph knew that God was ultimately in control of his life. No human action could thwart what God had in store for him—regardless of the harm intended or the damage inflicted.

Embrace this truth and you, like Joseph, will learn to forgive.