Author: Kevin

I am a follower of Jesus, husband, pastor, author, and caffeine addict. Please follow me on Facebook or Twitter. You may also want to consider subscribing to the RSS feed.

Purity and Intimacy

I think most people would admit that intimacy is important in a relationship. Talk about the importance of purity, however, and some are not as convinced. Whether we want to admit it or not, the two are connected. I’ll explain:

Drink water from your own well—
share your love only with your wife.
Why spill the water of your springs in the streets,
having sex with just anyone?
You should reserve it for yourselves.
Never share it with strangers.
-Proverbs 5:15-17

I have placed two pictures above. As you can see, one picture is my water dispenser. The other is water which has flowed down a freshly painted curb. Which one would you want to drink?

That’s a pretty easy question, right? The water in my dispenser is fresh and pure. The water on the street is contaminated—probably toxic.

Proverbs gives us some powerful imagery regarding purity and intimacy—the two are strongly connected. Water which has run down the street loses its value. In the same way, sex looses its value and intimacy when it is shared with someone other than your spouse. The more people you share it with, the less valuable it becomes.

If you want true sexual intimacy with your future spouse, strive for sexual purity. Wait and enjoy the gift of sex only with your spouse.

The "Pure" American and His Barong

Yesterday (Sunday) I had the opportunity to preach at University Baptist Church here in Manila (great experience). I wore a traditional white barong (they do communion on the first Sunday of the month, so all of the ushers and staff wear white shirts). I got some interesting looks later as I walked through the mall in my formal attire. I can’t blame the curious mall dwellers for staring—I guess I was kind of a walking contradiction.

Occasionally students will ask me if I am a “pure” American. Usually they are wondering if I’m part English or European. Believe it or not, sometimes they are wondering if I have Filipino blood (maybe they think I have a mestiza grandmother).

I always answer “yes,” but that is actually not such a simple question. I’ve been here for about four and a half years. This is my home. I’m still very American in some ways, but in others I’m not. I’m a walking contradiction, barong or no barong. Let me give you some examples:

*I can type text messages without even looking at my cell phone.

*I look both ways before crossing the street—even if it is a one-way street.

*I eat with a spoon and fork.

*I know the meaning of “barok,” “jologs,” “ebz,” “japorms,” and “social” (pronounced so-SHAL). I know that some of these terms are getting old and will be replaced soon.

*My favorite boxer has the nickname “PacMan.”

*I get annoyed or offended (sometimes both) when other foreigners criticize and stereotype Filipinos.

*I have more barongs in my closet than neckties (in fact, I’m not sure if I even have a tie here in my apartment—I think I left it in the States).

*I have a tendency to stare at other foreigners.

*I own a rice cooker (and I know how to use it).

*If I see an open tent with people gambling and drinking, I immediately look for a coffin. Speaking of which, I have preached at a funeral wake using a videoke machine as my sound amplifier.

*I ride jeepneys.

*I point using my lips instead of using my fingers.

*My friends call me a Bicolano.

*I think of “Kuya” as part of my first name.

*Being the only American in a room (or building, or entire mall) doesn’t make me the least bit uncomfortable—in fact, I feel quite at home.

*When in other countries I begin to desperately miss being with Filipinos (even when I’m in other Asian countries).

*I have translated for Filipino-Americans who don’t speak Tagalog (one of the more bizarre experiences of my life).

Does this sound like a “pure” American?