I have previously mentioned my status as a walking contradiction. Below is a journal entry that I wrote back in 2005 during a Christmas vacation to the States. I think about these types of things every time I visit here in the States:
Living in the Philippines has changed me—as if I am no longer fully American, but not Filipino either. I feel completely at ease in both places, but completely at home in neither. When I’m in the States I think about the relationships I have left on the other side of the globe. The same is true for my time spent in the Philippines. My emotional ties stretch across the globe, stretching me in the process.
I laugh at Filipinos when they use the word “cold,” and laugh at Americans when they use the word “traffic.”
I enjoy the ease at which I can drive down the country roads of my home town. I enjoy the ease at which I can make new friends in my beloved Philippines.
I do not understand how some Filipinos can buy a tiny packet of shampoo that has only one or two day’s use. I do not understand some Americans’ obsession with acquiring excess material wealth.
I am admirer, lover, and critic of both cultures. I am a man with two homes. It is both a blessing and a predicament.
