Pastor Kevin Sanders

"He must increase, but I must decrease." -John 3:30

Love and Good Intentions

I still remember something one of my Christian Education professors told me. He had a special gift in mind once one of his children decided to get engaged. He would take them to divorce court. That’s right—divorce court. There they would watch couples fight over everything from child custody to silverware—couples that once stood at the altar and publicly professed their love for each other.

This may not sound like a very good engagement gift. But my professor wanted his children to learn a very important lesson: Love and Good Intentions

Let’s think about this for a minute. How many of you know someone who has experienced a separation, divorce or some kind of failed marriage? We all have. Here’s what all these couples had in common: they also stood at the altar, looked lovingly into each other’s eyes, and vowed to love each other for the rest of their lives.

Sobering thought, huh? It should be.

“But Kevin, that could never happen to me. I have found my soul mate. Our love is like no other love.”

Don’t you think our before-mentioned examples said (or thought) the exact same thing?

I’m not trying to scare you out of love or marriage.  I would be the first to tell you what a blessing it is to be in a Christ-centered marriage.

But I hope you see the importance of making wise decisions—using your head as well as your heart. I also hope you will choose to make Christ the Lord of your relationships. Our love is never strong enough—we need His help.

Unless the LORD builds the house,
  the builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
  the guards stand watch in vain. 
-Psalm 127:1


  1. “But I hope you see the importance of making wise decisions—using your head as well as your heart. I also hope you will choose to make Christ the center of your relationships. Our love is never strong enough—we need His help.”

    —well said. i strongly agree.

  2. so true KEvin.

    Marriage is different from just bf-gf relationship.

    When not married, you go out to date smelling good and looking good. When married, you wake up to each other with afro hair and dragon breaths.

    Funny but for real. It’s a merging of two that most likely, have different views and take on things.

    Marriage is work, commitment, acceptance and a lot of PRAYER.

  3. At least my wife won’t have to worry about the afro hair part. But dragon breath–I have some mean morning breath sometimes.

  4. kuya kevin!!!! I miss this kind of post from yours! hehe!

    anyway, let me share na rin what i learned from one of our mentoring session:

    “The purpose of marriage is to demonstrate and deepen our love for God.” -Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

    (my take sa quote nya na yan: unless si Lord tlaga ang center at ang focus ng marriage (and every relationships) it won’t work.)

    Have you heard of his minisrty “Love and Respect”? We watched his conference (dvd) in our mentoting sessions last yr and it was really mind blowing and enlighthening. He also has a book with the same title.

    ayun lang. share lang! 🙂

  5. Lol @ mean breath. Well, i have a lot of hair on my head that in the morning it looks like I’m wearing a wig, at other times, the strands are just stiff and spiked up that if a lizard fell on them from the ceiling, it’d be dead.

    My point is, everyone has little ugly secrets that you only discover once you’rte already living with the person. But yes, marriage can still be a wonderful thing if Christ is in it.

  6. @Rajsh, thanks for dropping by. I’ve been very busy with less time for blogging. Hopefully I’ll have more time to write this month.

  7. Kevin, I tried posting a comment on your other blog, but it wouldn’t allow me to for some reason. I found your blog through Savvy’s Single Christian blog. I just want to thank you for what you are doing. Please, keep up with your blogs. It encourages us. (And I like the idea of you and Savvy publishing a book:)

  8. Thanks for stopping by, Jenny!

    Sorry about the comment issue on the other blog. That particular template apparently doesn’t work with certain comment settings (below the post). I’ve changed the settings back to something that works.

  9. hi there, visiting you back this is my first time also to visit your blog. I think i will learn from this site 🙂

  10. I love the story about your prof, Kuya Kevin! 😉 I would definitely love the same gift from my Dad someday…when(or if.. haha) I would get engaged. Blessings!

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