Pastor Kevin Sanders

"He must increase, but I must decrease." -John 3:30

Kissing and Legalism

I’ve already explained my convictions about kissing.  You can read them here: To Kiss or Not to Kiss?

I feel the need to talk about this a little more.  Why?  Well, I’m encountering people who are feeling guilty over breaking man-made rules.  They’ve been told kissing before marriage is a sin.  Sorry, but this just isn’t in the Bible.

“But Kevin, kissing can be dangerous and lead to sexual sin,” you may argue.  Yes, I addressed that in my article.

But let me remind you of something that is equally dangerous—adding to God’s commandments.

Didn’t Jesus rebuke the Pharisees for loading people down with extra-biblical burdens (Luke 11:46)?  Didn’t Paul say, “Do not go beyond what is written”? (1st Corinthians 4:6).  Do we believe the Bible is sufficient or not?

I completely understand those who want to save their first kiss for the altar.  I also understand those who decide not to kiss again until they are married.  As I’ve said, this is a wise and honorable decision.

But let’s be careful about treating our personal convictions as though they were God’s commandments.  We have no right to do so.

This is love for God: to obey his commands. And his commands are not burdensome . . . 
-1st John 3:5

Related Post:
Purity: Pendulum vs Plumbline

5 Comments

  1. “I completely understand those who want to save their first kiss for the altar. I also understand those who decide not to kiss again until they are married. As I’ve said, this is a wise and honorable decision. “

    NICE. in the end…its a personal conviction…and anything that is not of faith is a sin.

    i too am choosing the wise and honorable way.

  2. I have nothing against kissing when not married yet, TO A LIMIT , and only to one you’re committed to.

    I understand those who’ve decided to only kiss when married, a bit extreme for me BUT like I said, only if you’re already in a relationship.

    The thing is, some believe you have to kiss first to know and decide if there’s spark, now…something might spark there but definitely NOT LOVE. You can’t make a decision to love someone based on ‘just’ a kiss.

  3. Saving “the kiss” on the altar… sounds like Joshua Harris (if I remeber right from his book ‘boy meets girl’ ), which I think is his personal conviction and people should not make it “the” standard.

  4. It’s dangerous to put it this way Kevin. It’s might be misinterpreted or something especially that you’re a person with authority on the topic. But yes I’d agree it really depends on one’s conviction. that same principle applies in what to eat as well. but not all your readers can understand or feel convicted. i don’t know just trying to comment. God bless you!

    Your Daily Word

  5. Mike,
    Thanks for commenting, but I don’t see anything “dangerous” about what I’ve said here.

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