Pastor Kevin Sanders

"He must increase, but I must decrease." -John 3:30

Mothers becoming Grandmothers: Mother’s Day Reflections

This is a picture of my mom with Evan, my youngest nephew. Mom was overjoyed when she learned that she would be a grandmother—that’s the way it should be.

Some recent conversations come to mind as I think about Mother’s Day. Two of my friends have shared some personal information with me—they will be grandmothers soon. Sadly, their children (the ones becoming parents) are not married. Both of them gave me permission to write this article, and I will keep their names anonymous (in case you are tempted to speculate, keep in mind that these conversations could have transpired in the Philippines or the United States).

My friends are experiencing a range of emotions. They are excited about the new life coming into their family (children, after all, are a blessing, regardless of the circumstances they are born into). At the same time, they are very hurt and disappointed by the decisions that their children have made.

Both of these women strike me as really good moms. They have taught their children to fear God and have warned them about the consequences of premarital sex. Now that the deed is done, they are doing their best to be 100% supportive of their children.

I tried to give these moms some encouragement, reminding them that their children simply made their own decisions (moms tend to blame themselves for their kids’ bad choices). I also commended them for being supportive of their children as they face the responsibility of becoming parents.

Why am I writing about this? I want to give my readers a simple reminder: our decisions affect our entire family—especially our moms. One of the best ways to honor your mom is to make wise relationship decisions.

Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the LORD your God is giving you.
–Exodus 20:12

A wise son brings joy to his father,
but a foolish son grief to his mother.

–Proverbs 10:1


  1. thanks for writing about moms who have mixed feelings about becoming grandmoms because of their unmarried daughers’ pregnancies. here in the phils, though, the daughters are pressured to marry the jerks (for want of a milder term) while in the US, they don’t have that kind of pressure. we have two such marriages (the jerks revealing their full jerkdom upon becoming fathers)in my church. – ate joy

  2. i like your the title… Mothers becoming Grandmothers: Mother’s Day Reflections… it does make me think of myself, several years from now… it’s like i will be hearing my mom saying to me, “the grandmother that i once was is the grandmother that you are now…”

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