This is the story of one of the students I met while doing True Love Waits last year. The story is real, but I’ve changed the name:
“Jerry” was my school mate back in grade school. He was very athletic, part of the soccer team, and very popular. We lost contact after graduating from grade school. Our common friend passed away and I saw Jerry again after three years. I wasn’t expecting to see him there at the wake. He got my number from my nephew, who was also there at the wake. A few days later he called the house and we reminisced about the friend who passed away. He then asked me out. We went out a few times (but it was with friends).
Jerry was not studying at this time. His family was having financial problems and he also had discipline problems (he got in many fights because he was in a fraternity). His family’s financial problems were made worse because his brother got someone pregnant.
The day before my school’s Christmas break, he picked me up from school. I was dressed up, but he was wearing just his pambahay (casual house clothes) and he had no slippers! “We are going to my house so I didn’t dress up,” he said. I also discovered that he didn’t bring his driver’s license! Regardless, we were able to reach the condominium safely. He introduced me to his frat brothers and his siblings. I then met his mom, who just gave me a look then went on with what she was doing.
For some reason we were left alone in the condominium. He put pressure on me to have sex and I said “no.” I honestly wasn’t thinking about God, purity, or holiness then. I was more concerned that if I become pregnant, it wouldn’t look good because I was so skinny. I also “saw” in my mind the faces of the people that would be disappointed if we I choose to have premarital sex.
Some time later, I was on the internet and he happened to be logged in at the same time. He dumped me online. What a very cheap way to get dumped! So there I was, crushed—couldn’t believe what just happened. About a week after, I saw his Friendster picture with another girl. I read her testimonials for him. It said he was so fun to be with: they spend hours “drinking and smoking and talking about a lot of things.” She wrote those things when Jerry and I were still together. Conclusion: I was two-timed. Another stab for me.
A few months later, somebody told me that he got the girl pregnant and they moved to the province. He was just looking for somebody he could fool to give in. I’m grateful that the Lord protected me.
Don’t take it lightly or ignore it if somebody pressures you to have sex. Even if it’s just jokes or very slight hints. It just means he doesn’t respect you and doesn’t care about your future. Be discerning on every statement. Don’t be afraid to end the relationship if it’s not pleasing to the Lord. Your offering of obedience will please Him, and you will be spared from unnecessary pains and heartache.
Do you have a story that you think others could learn from? Feel free to email it to me (I’ll edit the story and change the names).
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